Not Until September

first days feel strangely out of body, if you can imagine. this i she
first time in my life that i haven't walked out one door with another
one immediately open (as in sustainable affordable income already
waiting for me). that means i am in this unknown zone and that has me
waking with 3 am panics so far that aren't very comfortable but
hopefully the catalyst i need to build up something. Have spoke to
two recent other university staffers and they are both saying, are you
looking now? (one needs someone, the other has inside contacts). a
piece of me...the job security seeking drone wants to say yes, but the
writer in me piped up last night and said...not at the moment,
talk to me again in September.....

felt good and scary.